Firefly Pointer Fiberglass Jacket: "Blacklisted" music

Saturday, August 17, 2013

"Blacklisted" music

 "Blacklisted" music is a term I use for music that you love but can't listen to because it reminds you of something or someone painful. I think most of us can relate to this, music is often tied to memories and especially when you are a couple. Every couple (for the most part) has a song, and couples tend to make mixed tapes and send each other songs through Youtube. I've definitely been there.

 When the break up comes, it's just too painful to listen to those songs. Even if they were songs you loved before or independently of them, you find yourself vetoing them for a little while. I go through this often but always emerge again. I always find it a bummer that I have to avoid certain songs or bands because it makes me sad. Music has a lot of power in that way. It has the ability to change your mood or remind you of another time. I had a break up earlier this year with someone I loved very much. There are many great qualities about him but one was his taste in music. He liked all the same things I did, but more over had an appreciation for the power of music. Everyone is not like this.

 He loved The Monkees, which is pretty uncommon in dudes. He loved Bowie and was totally in touch with his gender identity. This marking the first time I fell in love, I finally understood love. A good friend of mine often says "He who tastes knows"- ancient proverb. And I can say I understand that saying better than ever now too. I understood all those love songs I've been hearing since birth. "Gee, love sounds nice." I thought. And indeed it is. I would liken it to winning a million dollar jackpot, but infinitely more precious.

 I understood the love songs for the first time in my life. And sadly, once I experienced a broken heart the same was true for all the songs about love lost. Love and love lost have proven, at least to me to be the highest and lowest of emotions. Our song was "Androgynous" by Joan Jett. But so many, many songs reminded me of him. Since our parting, I have been unable to listen to that song much. The few times it came up, I either listened to it as a way to get over it or skipped it all together. I hate that though. I hate avoiding an artist I like because I'm heart broken.

 In this time while dealing with a broken heart I am listening to music and slowly beginning to heal. Songs that used to sting don't burn as much, and in time they wont hurt at all. Feeling kinda like music is my life preserver and I'm in a rough sea.

Do you "blacklist" music? 

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